Letting Go

Today’s therapy day.  Usually I take a train part of the way and walk the rest, but the rail employees are on strike at the moment.  Good for them, I say, they’re probably being paid dirt yet the whole country relies on them.

Meanwhile the rail CEO’s and Important People rake in the cash for effectively making bad decisions around how rail money is managed.  The worst part of that mismanagement being that they’re paid too much.  It’s the same old story, the workers get it in the neck.  All the pious, pompous rationalizations that spew forth when a big strike action happens drive me crazy.  The workers are irresponsible, greedy, lazy, they’ll bring the country to its knees, the cost of living will rise again, blah blah blah and it’s all their fault.

Rubbish.  The workers are not the greedy ones.  And the cost of living rises because management mismanages.   So I say, hold on as long as you can, guys, and I hope you get your increase.

Anyway, I got a lift real early, so armed with my recently completed 3rd draft script I recklessly went to a café to wait.  In and of itself not so reckless I guess.  Just spending money on a buttery croissant and coffee.  I didn’t care.  A girl’s got to have a treat now and then.  I felt curiously able to believe that life in its entirety is a good thing; that I don’t have to control anything at all.   I guess I let my defenses down.  The man who took my coffee order and the young woman who brought my croissant were both responsive and quite beautiful and heart-soothing.

A few feet away two young women were having coffee.  One was talking at the speed of light, almost hysterically, she just couldn’t stop.  I watched her for a while.  There was a part of her that looked like a young frightened child.  Desperately trying to please, and wildly trying also control her world.  Her energy was amazing.  I wanted to go over to her and say “it’s okay, you can slow down.   Shhh, everything’s going to be alright”.

Instead I said it to myself.   Lounging back on a comfy sofa, I closed my eyes, let go and let life wash over me.


One thought on “Letting Go

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